Think for a moment about how you see the world.
Would you be more likely to describe it as a beautiful place with treasure around every corner?
Or as an ugly and boring place where exploration is unlikely to result in much of anything?
These aren’t random worldviews. They’re examples drawn from the 26 deep-seated primal beliefs about the world identified by Dr. Jeremy “Jer” Clifton and his team at the University of Pennsylvania. They found that these “primals” determine whether we see the world, for instance, as safe or dangerous, enticing or dull, alive or mechanistic. They also shape how someone feels about the world. If someone sees the world as inherently dangerous, for example, they are much more likely to be anxious. They’re probably anticipating danger around every corner and acting accordingly.
Why does that happen?
Often, our subjective beliefs become so much a part of who we are and how we see the world that we begin to see them as principles, as universal, objective truths that not only determine what we should do and how, but what we even see as possible.
Stephen Covey, in his seminal book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, described principles as “‘natural laws’ in the human dimension that are just as real, just as unchanging and unarguably ‘there’ as laws such as gravity are in the physical dimension.” Because our beliefs are true to us—whether they’re objectively true or not—they guide our behavior.
This link between what someone thinks and how they act is critical to understanding why a particular case for change doesn’t work and figuring out how to craft one that does.
Imagine you’re the founder of a company with a technology that captures carbon to help protect the environment. You need to raise capital to continue your work and achieve the impact you want, which means you need to craft your case to potential investors. Because you believe the world is a beautiful place, you make the following argument:
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- “The beauty of our world needs protection. (Part one—assumption #1, a primal)
- “Capturing carbon is essential to protecting the environment. (Part two—assumption #2)
- “That’s why investing in this carbon capturing technology will help protect our beautiful planet.”(The conclusion that results from the first two statements)
If you’re speaking to an investor who shares your primal the-world-is-beautiful-and-needs-protection belief, the story makes sense, as would the related action: investing. You’d still need to show that your technology is indeed effective at capturing carbon before they’d commit, but as far as the basic idea is concerned, the investor would likely agree in principle because they agree with the principles on which you’ve based your case.
But what if you’re talking to someone who, at a primal level, doesn’t share your belief that the world is beautiful?
In that case, they literally can’t agree with your argument because it’s based on a principle they don’t agree is true: that the world’s beauty needs protection. The same is true if they don’t agree with you about the consequences of carbon emissions. In their minds, what is there to protect? Why would we protect an ugly world? If the change you’re making contradicts the fundamental principles they see as true, no amount of logical reasoning or compelling data will sway them.
No matter how beautifully built your argument, how elegant or attractive your pitch deck, or how solid your business plan, it’s someone’s principles that set the patterns of their agreement and the actions that follow. Until the story you’re telling aligns with the principles in the arguments they already agree with, it won’t resonate—because it can’t. The story will only resonate when the substance does, when your principles and theirs align.
What This Principle Means
Once you see the value of making a change, it can be hard to understand why someone else (or everyone!) doesn’t see that value, too. But if someone doesn’t see the world the way you do, they can’t see the value the way you do. Without understanding the value, though, they have no reason to act. It’s not just that your opinions are fundamentally different, it’s that your outlooks on the world are fundamentally different. Their opinion will change only if their outlook changes, something that’s very unlikely at the primal level.
You already know the bad news: hammering someone with why you think a change makes sense from your perspective not only doesn’t work (because they can neither understand nor agree), it also activates the other person’s reactance.
As a result, they’ll usually dig in even deeper and defend their position even more passionately.
The good news is that inspiring change is still possible, but only if you change your perspective to see the world their way. Once you do that, you can see which principles you share, build a case that connects those principles to the change you seek, and make an unfamiliar action align with someone else’s familiar patterns. When you can find common ground in core beliefs and, with them, build a bridge to the change you wish to see, you’re not only respecting someone’s different viewpoint, you’re using it as a powerful tool for effective persuasion and meaningful change.
IN OTHER WORDS…The actions that people agree with are based on beliefs they already have. To understand an action, understand the outlook that explains it.
Why Does It Matter?
People’s brains are too efficiency-oriented to waste time inventing new stories every time they need to make decisions. So, instead, the brain has some go-to ingredients for building those stories: pre-existing beliefs and the principles that encode them into behavior. Change is based on story, but the stories we agree with are based on the beliefs we already have.
Unfortunately, most of us are blissfully unaware of many of these core beliefs until something happens or someone asks us to do something or act in a way that violates one of them and creates dissonance.
These kinds of hidden principles also exist at the organizational level. Professor Jim Detert of the University of Virginia calls them the “deep rules” of an organization, and they, too, affect patterns of behavior. For example, an organization may support diversity, equity, and inclusion programs as part of its internal and external purpose and brand. If, in the face of declining revenues, however, they decide to cut those programs, it could be because of a principle they hold even more deeply: that of maximizing shareholder value.
Deep beliefs are the foundations of all change because they determine the patterns for which stories, arguments, and actions someone agrees with—whether consciously or unconsciously. What someone has believed in the past almost always determines what they will believe and act on in the future, and it’s their principles that set these patterns.
In the words of author Antoine de Saint-Exupéry, “What is essential is invisible to the naked eye.” That’s why surfacing these often-silent assumptions is critical for anyone looking to foster change, whether in themselves, others, or within organizations.
By bringing these core principles into the light—and by saying them in a way someone can’t unhear—you can open the door to alternative outcomes and greater understanding and connect with others on a more fundamental, human level.
P.S. Guess what?! What you just read was an excerpt of my new book, Say What They Can’t Unhear. It’s coming out October 8, 2024! This book will explore more in-depth my nine “persuasion proverbs,” that are easy to remember, simple to implement, and will give you the tools to transform any audience of lukewarm prospects into passionate believers.